necessarian | hp fandom: still here, apparently

tonight, for the first time in literally months, i managed to write fic again. two thousand words in one big stretch. i'm continuing work on the hufflepuff draco series, and i will once again apologise for my glacial pace, as i noticed it's been over two years since i posted the first part. in all fairness, the newly minted dr. renaissance (i'll stop showing off about it soon, i promise) has been doing other things. but hopefully i can put something out again soon! i know this sounds corny, but i have been kind of humbled by my weird little genfic about hufflepuff draco learning to be a good kid reaching 300 kudos. i promise you he makes even more progress in part 2. (who among us hasn't daydreamed about deradicalising draco malfoy at the tender age of twelve?)

the other thing: it's a weird time to be a hp fan right now. there are plenty of terrible takes floating around, not least of all jkr's. some people think we have to abandon the books/fandom wholesale. some people have decided hp doesn't belong to jkr anymore; others have rightly pointed out that there have always been flaws in the series, and that we can't separate the author from the works. mostly i have been feeling uncomfortable because it's been widely known that jkr is a terf for quite a while now, but i guess it took a "fuck it, mask off" moment for people to pay attention on such a grand scale. i first worked through a version of this many years ago, as a teen, when i became more aware of racist and antisemitic tropes and the way they're employed in hp. could i have chalked that up to ignorance? not after she kept perpetuating those tropes in the fantastic beasts movies. with jkr's terf activity on twitter, i don't think there's ever been any question about it. so to that end, i'm glad people are finally taking it seriously.

my stance on it is basically, people who need to step away from the fandom can and should be given the space to do that peacefully and quietly. i don't seek to defend my participation in a fandom for a series of books made by someone i fundamentally dislike and disagree with for her bigoted views. it's just, with childhood nostalgia, things get sticky. as much as we can't separate jkr's harmful beliefs from the hp series and its flaws, it's also hard for many of us to separate ourselves (and our fic, and our headcanons) from our love for the series. yes, the hp series has antisemitic features to it. yes, i projected on anthony goldstein as a jewish kid because i recognised his jewish surname, and no, i cannot excise my love for the version of his character and his world that i've created. harry potter, the series, cannot exist independently of jkr's bigotry. but the fandom can, and on many levels does, and has for years.

i've revisited my feelings on this, as i do every time jkr's bigotry is in the spotlight. maybe one day i'll change my mind and be on my way, but for now, i'm still here. i have devoted so much time and love to hp fic and the hp fandom. i will continue to put love into my works, and to uplift everyone else in this community: especially lgbt fans, fans of colour, and jewish fans.

so anyway, if you need me, i'll be expanding the anthony goldstein cinematic universe. (yes, huffledraco will also have him in it eventually.) peace.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Oh, I'm so glad to see you around and to hear you're back wrting fic!

Now I'm eager to meet your HuffleDraco (and I hope he doesn't mind my capitalisation :)), and I'm happy for him! I'm trying to imagine how motivating it must feel to have your fic received like that.

Thank you for writing about your decision to stay in the fandom. I understand that some people feel they want to or must leave. Just as you say about yourself, i have devoted so much time and love to hp fic and the hp fandom. i will continue to put love into my works. I've never been good at following what writers say outside their work, and it's thanks to the fandom I've now (after my return last year) learnt to understand better how I can't accept JKR's views. But my fic has never been based on anything she said outside the first five HP books – and as far as I've been influenced by the last two books, it's meant that I've been emphasising what I found probliematic in her choices. What I've written and continue to write doesn't belong to her. I hope there'll be people who stay and continue to write better stories.

thank you! i hope you'll enjoy HuffleDraco (who has no aversion to caps!) - he's a pet project of mine, and i'm very proud of it :')

i think you hit the nail on the head with What I've written and continue to write doesn't belong to her. we are at the point where harry potter has become a beast uncontrollable by its creator, and honestly i think it's brilliant that fandom has found so much joy and creativity in that.

I've now enjoyed the first scenes of your HuffleDraco, and I hope you enjoy continuing to write the fic. The writing is excellent as I remember it's in all the fics by you I've read. And I believe there's a purpose of writing this kind of an AU. It also feels good to hear you say you're proud of this project. That reminds me of a Snowflake post of yours and of some conversations we had in January... (I've now found only part of them here: https://necessarian.dreamwidth.org/23757.html#comments

Yes, I remember the two of us have agreed before that when we can't admire JKR as we once thought or hoped we could, we've got only more reason to stay in the fandom and write just what we want and subvert the canon.

I've been fortunate to have both the time and the motivation to stay and write, but haven't managed to start a reviewing community or shared many fics by other people – while I'm still constantly desperate for feedback.

ahh, thank you! that means a lot.

i understand the need for feedback; it's a huge motivator in writing. but conversely, it's hard to find the time to rec and review, or to keep up that momentum. a lot of people have said that staying at home during the pandemic has left them more time to read fic, and looking at ao3's traffic, i believe it! but i've mostly been too busy with work to read, and i find it needs to become a habit for it to go anywhere.

Partly thanks to the exchange here, I realised it was high time to make a rec post again, and I've now recced your HuffleDraco, too, here.

ahh, thanks so much!! btw, i posted the second part last night: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24806182 :D

You're welcome. (I'm glad I've even got some comments on the rec post.)

Oh, another 13 000 words! Congratulations! (I wonder if you've regained any ability to read fic yet? :))

still working on my fic reading skills... work has been crazy, but i'm reading books again, which is a good start!

I don't know why but when I'm in a fandom I never almost think about the creator. T_T Like with HP I'd read fics,look at drawings,do some of my own and all that but it's more out of my love for certain characters and the world and not for JKR herself. Her recent tweets are on a whole other level and hurt a lot of people but I don't know how saying that the books don't belong to JK anymore helps anyone?!Or that we'd HAVE to abandon the fandom/books? I've not been very active recently in the HP fandom and I stay in my little space and don't interact outside of commenting on/creating fanworks so maybe I can't feel the whole thing on a big level. Just my two cents,I hope I didn't come across as uncaring or mean. T_T

Also HuffleDraco sounds interesting!:D

it doesn't come across mean at all! i think a lot of people find solace in the idea that the books don't belong to jkr anymore because it gives them a degree of separation from her bigotry. i can understand that, but unfortunately it also absolves her of responsibility for the aspects of her bigotry that do come across in the books, if that makes sense.

but, yeah, i think it's totally valid to want to stick to your corner! :)

<3 I feel this a lot, especially because I've been feeling a lot of HP nostalgia recently, completely unrelated to JKR's nonsense. I think this is really the only way we can approach it . I do think a lot of people are mistaking "Death of the Author" to mean the author no longer needs to exist, rather than the complexity of what you've described above - which is that once you read something, you are also "co-authoring" meaning and in some ways the "text" becomes equally yours and you do end up creatively repurposing it, which ofc creates an even more complex relationship with the work.

Anyway: EXTREMELY excited for the next installment of hufflepuff!draco! And its expansion into the AGCU (anthony goldstein cinematic universe) :P

for some reason i did not get an email notification for this comment, so i apologise for only just glimpsing it now! but i'm absolutely with you here. it's very tiring to see so many people willfully misusing death of the author over this. love your point about the reader as coauthor.

funnily enough, anthony IS in the latest installment, though not by name. so it totally counts :P

*waves* I'm still a fan of the books. And, I'll read anything from that universe that she writes in the future.

do you mean like, future HP books? :0

hp fandom: still here, apparently

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